Life Changing
by cuz-CM's-awesome
Summary: Spencer and Penelope have been happily dating for over a year but after a particular case Spencer has gotten it into his head that he wants more in his life. Will he and Penelope be able to work it out? Spoilers for S09 E07, Sequel to 'Rules of Attraction'


**Disclaimer: I don't own Criminal Minds and I'm not making any profit off of this story. **

**Summary: Spencer and Penelope have been happily dating for over a year but after a particular case Spencer has gotten it into his head that he wants more in his life. Will he and Penelope be able to work it out? Spoilers for S9 E07, Sequel to 'Rules of Attraction' **

**Enjoy! **

…

Spencer ran up the steps to the door of the small apartment he shared with Penelope. The jet had landed about half an hour ago and he only had an hour to get ready before he and Penelope had to meet the team at The Benjamin.

After unlocking the door Spencer pushed it open and placed his messenger bag down on the table inside the door. He closed the door behind him and then made his way down the hallway towards their bedroom, he wanted to have a quick shower and change his clothes before they left.

He walked into their bedroom just as Penelope was exiting the bathroom with a towel wrapped around her torso. He smiled at her as he headed over. When he was just a few inches away he leaned down and placed a kiss on her lips, he was happy to be back.

However when he pulled away she had a scowl on her face "What is it…?" he started to ask when out of nowhere Penelope gave him a light smack to the arm. "Penelope?" he questioned.

"That's for taking a risk with the scissors," she said with a huff "Derek told me about your heroic actions, Spencer that man might have been crazy but he still could have called your bluff. You could have ended up with your neck slashed!"

Spencer's expression softened when he realized just what she had been worried about. He cupped her cheek with his hand and said "But that didn't happen, I'm still here and I'm fine. We needed to get the weapon away from him and it was the only thing I could think of."

Penelope bit her lip "Still, you know I hate it when you take risks like that, I don't know what I would do if I lost you."

"Hey," Spencer said running his thumb over her cheek, "I'm right here and I'm not going anywhere."

He moved his hands and wrapped his arms around her, she did the same while leaning up to capture his lips "I love you," she whispered against them when she pulled away.

Spencer kissed her again, showing just how much he loved her. When he pulled away he was happy to see that a smile had returned to her face "I'm glad you're home."

"I'm glad to be home," Spencer said grinning and then without a thought he whispered "I delivered a baby today."

Penelope grinned at him "Yes you did, and if I heard correct that little boy is now your namesake?"

Spencer nodded "He was so small, and it was amazing to hold him in my arms. I read about it but it wasn't like I had expected at all…it was just unbelievable."

Penelope patted his arm "I'm glad that…" she trailed off when she got a look at Spencer's face. He seemed nervous. She frowned and studied him, he had a somewhat hopeful look in his eyes "What?" she asked.

Without saying anything he took her hand and led her to the bed where he motioned for her to sit down. Shaking her head she did so and watched as Spencer sat down beside her. It took him a moment to get his thoughts in order and he was making her nervous.

"Spencer, please what's wrong?" Penelope asked placing a hand on his knee.

Spencer sighed "Nothing is wrong, it's just after today. After delivering Spencer Johnson, and holding his tiny squalling body in my arms. Looking at him as he stopped his crying, it just made me feel…happy. Penelope, I want that, I want to have a son or daughter to spoil and love and take care of."

Penelope was staring at him blankly when he finished, her hand had fallen away from his knee and Spencer started to feel his hopefulness slipping away.

Penelope looked away from him, unable to meet his eye. She felt bad but she was scared, they had only been dating for a bit more than a year and the thought of children hadn't really crossed her mind. She loved kids, Jack and Henry were two of her favorite people to be around after all, but after working for the BAU and seeing just what monsters were out there, she didn't know if she wanted to bring kids into a world like theirs.

She bit her lip as she felt Spencer tensing beside her "Penelope?" he asked.

She looked up at him "Spence," she began reaching for his hand "I just, I don't know if I'm ready to have children yet. It's a huge step and we haven't been dating that long, we're not even married yet."

"But look at JJ and Will, they had Henry long before they got married and they made it work, we could too. I know you'd make a great mom; you love kids and are so good with them." Spencer pressed.

Penelope sighed, shaking her head "I know after today you're probably feeling elated, and I understand that but don't you think we could be jumping into this without enough thought? We can think about it, and talk some more about it and leave the possibility open for the future, maybe in a year or two?"

Spencer pulled his hand away from hers "Yeah," he said shortly "you're right it was a silly idea."

"Spencer that's not what I said," Penelope began but he wasn't listening to her.

He had pushed himself to his feet and was making his way to the bathroom "I need to have a shower and get ready or we're going to be late."

"Spencer?" Penelope tried again but he had made it to the bathroom and was closing the door.

Penelope felt horrible as she stared at the closed door but she didn't know what to do, she couldn't just throw caution to the wind on this one. A baby would be life changing, she wasn't ready for that.


End file.
